The eve of Yom Kippur: What should we do today?

TSEDAQA: It is customary to give extra charity on the eve of Yom Kippur. Practicing charity is one of the best ways to show our renewed commitment to kindness and righteousness (See Kapparot, below).

EATING: In the eve of Yom Kippur, we should eat and drink more than usual,in preparation for the fast. Eating more than usual will give us strength to endure the fast and according to some Rabbis, it makes-up for the Yom Tob's (or this year: Shabbat's) meals, which cannot be eaten on Yom Kippur because of the fast. Before the fast begins, we have the se'udat hamafseqet: the last meal before the fast. We should finish eating before 6:10 NYT.

ASKING FORGIVENESS: Sins committed against another person cannot be atoned for on Yom Kippur, until one seeks first, forgiveness from the person he/she has hurt. Thus, it is necessary to visit (or at least call) friends, family, and any person whom one may have aggravated, offended or spoken ill of in the past year and ask forgiveness. That includes friends, colleagues, spouse and other. family members. Special attention should be given in asking forgivenessfrom our parents.

FORGIVING: Many people practice the beautiful custom of 'forgiving' everyone that has offended them, removing all bad feeling that might be stored in one's heart. Parents should also forgive their children in their hearts, thus saving them from the serious transgression of Kibud Ab vaEm.

MIKVEH: It is customary for men to immerse in a Mikveh (ritual bath) on the eve of Yom Kippur. This reminds us of the kohen gadol who would purify himself in the Mikveh before performing his Holy service ('abodat Yom haKippurim).

Candle lighting for Shabbat and Yom Kippur in NYC: 6:10 PM

This year, because of Shabbat, when lighting the candles women should say:

... lehadlik ner shel Shabbat veYom haKippurim. (The Mashadi custom is to recite also Shehecheyanu).

Yom Kippur ends in NYC at: 7:16 PM

Who is exempted from fasting on Yom Kippur and how to eat when you cannot fast?

Pregnancy and Yom Kippur

An English version of the Viduy

Wearing non-leather shoes on Yom Kippur.

What is the best way of doing Kapparot?

Text for Kapparot

Click HERE to read

'Steve Jobs and Yom Kippur'

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Who is exempted from fasting on Yom Kippur?

There are five prohibitions on Yom Kippur. All learned from the biblical verse: (Vaikra 23:27): 'On the 10th of Tishri, you should deprive yourselves..."

The five prohibitions are:

(1) Eating and drinking, (2) washing our body (3) anointing our body (4) having marital relations and (5) wearing leather shoes.

Everyone has to fast on Yom Kippur, except:

1. Minors: a boy or a girl younger than 9 years old should not fast, even for a few hours. When they reach 9, they might fast for a couple of hours, but only if they are in good health. In the following years the parents should encourage them to fast for a little longer so they will slowly get used to do a complete day of fasting. When the son or the daughter reach 11 years old, they should try to fast the whole day, if they are in good health. A healthy girl from the age of 12 and a healthy boy from the age of 13 are obligated to fast, as everyone else.

2. Mothers: After childbirth, during the first 3 days, a mother should not fast. The same rule applies for the first 72 hours following a miscarriage. After 72 hours from the time of childbirth until the 7th day after birth, if the mother says that she needs to eat, she should eat. After the 7th day she has to fast, unless otherwise indicated by a physician. A woman in labor cannot fast. (Pregnant women, see here).

3. Sickness: A person who is sick or weak because of his age, or a treatment and is getting medication, should get the advice of a knowledgable physician to see if he can fast and/or stop taking his medication for a day. After talking to a Doctor a Rabbi could help the patient to plan how to eat his food (see below). In a case of a chronic illness, such as diabetes, and especially in a case where there is a risk (Safek) of endangering someone's life, one should break the fast even if one is not able to consult with a physician.

According to Jewish Law, if a Chole -a sick person- asserts that he or she needs to eat, he or she should be fed, even without asking a Doctor.

If you were instructed by your doctor to eat on Yom Kippur, and you don't need to eat a large amount of food or liquids at once, you should proceed as follows:

1. Eat a portion of food that weights less than 1 Oz. (1 ounce = 30 grams). After you finished the first portion you should wait ten minutes and eat a second portion, less than 1 Oz. . You could do this, until you recover.

2. For drinking, you should drink up to a little more than 1 Oz. Then, wait 5 minutes and drink 1 Oz. again, and so forth.

If possible, once you feel better, you should continue the fast.

To measure "1 ounce" it is advisable to use the plastic 1 Oz. liquor shot cups (Kiddush little plastic cups).

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The Meaning of Kol Nidrei

The extraordinary history and lesson of this moving prayer.

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Pregnancy on Yom Kippur.

The following information is intended as an educational guideline for normal and healthy pregnancies. You should not rely on this information as a substitute for personal medical advice.

A pregnant woman should observe the fast normally, provided she and her baby are in good health. Nevertheless, if during Yom Kippur she feels sick (especially if she is vomiting or having other symptoms of dehydration) she should break the fast and eat immediately. However, mild dizziness and nausea that can be cope with by lying down on a couch or a bed, are considered normal, and should be endured.

VERY IMPORTANT

Dr Jessica Jacob O.B. explains that according to research done on healthy pregnant women, there is no evidence that fasting would bring any complication to the mother or her baby. Three years ago, Dr J. Jacob gave a very detailed lecture in our community on 'Pregnancy and Yom Kippur'. I strongly recommend listening to her lecture where she explains the studies that were done on this subject. She also explains why would doctors typically advise a pregnant woman against fasting; how to cope with discomfort and in which circumstances a pregnant woman MUST break the fast, etc.

Click here to listen to Dr Jacob's lecture

For pregnant women and other cases

If you were instructed by your doctor to eat on Yom Kippur, and you don't need to eat a large amount of food or liquids at once, you should proceed as follows:

1. Eat a portion of food that weights less than 1 Oz. (1 ounce = 30 grams). After you finished the first portion you should wait ten minutes and eat a second portion, less than 1 Oz. . You could do this, until you recover.

2. For drinking, you should drink up to a little more than 1 Oz. Then, wait 5 minutes and drink 1 Oz. again, and so forth.

If possible, once you feel better, you should continue the fast.

To measure "1 ounce" it is advisable to use the plastic 1 Oz. liquor shot cups (Kiddush little plastic cups).

Click here for an inspiring and beautiful

message of Yom Kippur by Charlie Harary

An English Version of the Viduy

One of the most important Mitzvot we perform on Yom Kippur's is the Viduy (see here ).

The Viduy (=confession) describes the sins and transgressions we might have committed and for which we express regret and decide to keep ourselves away from.

In the Viduy we clearly say and admit our transgressions, in the same way that one who is addicted to alcohol articulates his admission saying: "I'm an alcoholic", as one of the firsts step toward his cure.

The Viduy also helps us remembering and identifying the wrongdoings that we might have forgotten, or that we might have unconsciously suppressed or that we might simply not have in mind, because we have already got used to them.

Unlike other Tefilot, it is absolutely imperative to understand the meaning of the words we are saying in the Viduy. Or else, regret and contrition (=Teshuba) for our transgressions, cannot take place. Therefore, it is not only permitted, butmandatory to say the Viduy in the language one understands, if one does not know Hebrew.

We say the Viduy several times on Yom Kippur and we say it in plural (see here).

The Viduy is written in Hebrew alphabetical order.

The following text ( VIDUY IN ENGLISH ) is a brief version of a Viduy, which will hopefully help the reader to understand the meaning and ideas expressed in the Viduy, and B'H inspire him or her to achieve a higher level of Teshuba.

This text could be used in Yom Kippur alongside with other versions of the Viduy.

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Seeking forgivness

These days, aseret yeme teshuba, we should prepare ourselves for the most important day of the year: Yom Kippur. The day in which we present ourselves before God, repenting of our transgressions and begging haShem Almighty for finding us deserving of another year of life. On Yom Kippur, we are told by the Rabbis, we are completely forgiven from any ritual transgressions (Shabbat, Kashrut, Tefilin, etc.) we had committed against God, provided we take responsibility for them (without making excuses!), we confess them and we make the decision to abandon them.

What about the offenses against other people? Are they too automatically forgiven on Yom Kippur? Absolutely not. Before Yom Kippur, we need to seek(not just 'ask'!!!) forgiveness from those we have harmed or offended. In preparation for Yom Kippur, then, we should carefully recall who we might have harmed, including friends, colleagues and especially members of our family.

Asking forgiveness is probably one of the most challenging acts we might need to do in our lives. Because of the embarrassment involved in admitting our fault and say "I WAS WRONG".

We might also feel very insecure. Perhaps the offended friend is never going to forgive us.

In this case, the Rabbis said: "One should take along three people to intercede for him and plead with the offended to forgive him. If necessary, he must repeat and try three times as his penitence. ... If he asks forgiveness three times and the other refuses to forgive, he need not return again..." (Meam Loez)

If one have offended his or her father or mother, there is no limit to the times one needs to go and ask for their forgiveness.

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